Meet the Bikeaholics
Alright, gather round.
We get asked all the time: “Who actually works here?”
Short answer: riders, parents, procrastinators, World Cup experienced mechanics, cargo bike kings, at least one German, and a bloke who thinks rocks are a personality trait.
Long answer? Read on.
Mat – Co Founder, Chief Swearer, Big Dog
From Scotland. Likes Rocks. Dad. Boss. Legend (so he thinks.)
Mat is one of the two people you can blame for Bikeaholic existing. Scottish by birth, Queenstown by choice, and held together largely by dad jokes and caffeine.
Who is he?
“Mat from Scotland. Dad, boss and chief swearer. Is it lunch time yet?”
What he thinks he does at Bikeaholic vs what he really does at Bikeaholic:
He reckons he tells people what to do. In reality, everyone tells him what to do.
What he rides:
He’d love to say his Sentinel, but honesty prevails - it’s usually the Yeti LTE e-bike because, in his own words, he’s “lazy and fat”. Respect the self awareness.
Tim Tam slam ability:
Two. Exactly two. Double coats only. Any more and it’s cardiac arrest territory.
If you hear laughter followed by swearing followed by a deep sigh, that’s Mat trying to be productive.
Justin – Co-Founder, Big Ideas Guy, Undercover Operations
Just-in with Justin. Remote operations underway in Japan.
If Bikeaholic has two people to blame for existing, Justin is the other one. Australian import, metalhead, and possessor of genuinely unfair tech abilities. Mostly works undercover, quietly keeping the whole shit show running behind the scenes.
Who is he?
Justin.
Physically absent.
Spiritually still on the group chat.
Last known location: Japan.
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Hard to say, his big brain operates on a need to know basis.
Confirmed: running Snopro from Japan and executing behind the scenes Bikeaholic operations from afar - classified, complicated, and well above our combined brain power.
Mission critical: ensuring Liam and Mat don’t derail the operation.
What he rides:
Currently: powder.
Occasionally: a Sight VLT (when he remembers what dirt looks like).
Tim Tam intake:
Not allowed. International Tim Tam ban remains in effect while he’s in Japan.
Shameless snow plug click here
Liam – Boss Baby, Master of Disaster, Cargo King
From Phillip Island. Dad squared.
Liam runs the shop, which is an inflated title meaning organiser of chaos. If something is somehow working despite the odds, Liam probably fixed it five minutes ago without telling anyone.
Who is he?
An Aussie who escaped Phillip Island (great place, terrible for mountain biking) and moved to New Zealand for actual mountains. Full time dad. Full time cargo bike enthusiast.
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Thinks he manages the store. Actually cleans up Mat’s mess constantly. Quote of the year: “Mat once said he only hires people better than him.”
What he rides:
A ridiculously over built custom Omnium cargo bike (cool, obviously). Mountain bike of choice: Norco Optic.
Tim Tam strategy:
One at a time. Makes the packet last. Absolute discipline.
Jarna – GIF Lord, Big Dog of Workshop
Has seen things. World Cup things.
Jarna is the mechanic other mechanics quietly listen to. Spent time working at World Cups and somehow still tolerates us.
Who is he?
“Who am I? That’s a question I ask myself every morning.”
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Thinks he runs a workshop full of hopes and dreams. Actually complains about everything, yells at everyone, and occasionally admits he might also be wrong.
What he rides:
Transition Patrol. As it should be.
Tim Tam status:
Yes.
Sacha – Frenchie, Straight-Up Mechanic
Does bike mechanic. Is happy.
Sacha is refreshingly literal and exactly what you want in a mechanic.
Who is he?
“I’m Sacha."
What he thinks he does vs reality:
He does bike mechanic. He is here to do bike mechanic. This is a good role.
What he rides:
Norco Sight.
Tim Tam knowledge:
No. (Only if its cheese.)
Nehuen – Speed Demon, Snack Destroyer
Argentinian. Moves fast. Eats faster.
Nehuen is fast on bikes, skis, sailboats, snowboards - if it moves, he’s into it.
Who is he?
“I’m Nehuen?”
(Confidence varies.)
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Thinks he fixes bikes. Actually eats all the junk food customers bring us.
What he rides:
Merida 160.
Tim Tam intake:
All of them. (Including yours.)
Millie – Website Guru, Spreadsheet Assassin
(As last pictured riding a bike.)
0 testicles. Quite aggressive.
Millie keeps the digital side of Bikeaholic from falling into a flaming dumpster fire. Also the reason you’re reading this, unfortunately.
Who is she?
“The shop’s sole female employee.” Pray for her.
What she thinks she does vs reality:
Keeps the boys in line. Keeps the website alive.
In reality: spreadsheets, bad blogs, emotional damage to Mat, and regular headlocks on Nehuen.
What she rides:
A scuba tank. No suspension complaints. Terrible on skyline.
Tim Tam consumption:
Correlates directly with Mats behaviour.
George – Star Salesman, Not a Grom Grom
English. Bristol born. Reels addict.
George is technically an adult but spiritually still a grom. He sells bikes like a weapon and somehow eats an entire packet of Tim Tams without blinking.
Who is he?
“GEORGE WITH A CRIPPLING REELS ADDICTION.” Shares a room with Jethro. Answering these questions feels like a dating app.
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Tries to be funny. Isn’t funny. Still beloved.
What he rides:
Transition Sentinel (and yes, he calls it a Tranny Sentinel and no, he’s not stopping).
Tim Tam capacity:
The whole pack. No survivors.
Tristan (Justin) – Living, Laughing, Breaking Bikes
Breaks bikes. Cries occasionally. (Because he's German.)
Tristan, also known as Justin, is our German import and living proof that laughing while breaking bikes is a lifestyle.
Who is he?
“Living, breathing, laughing.” From Germany (we think).
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Came to have fun and gain experience. Actually gets bullied for riding/ breaking bikes, and being German. Cries a lot on lunch break.
What he rides:
Marin Alpine Trail XR.
Tim Tam slam skill:
Didn’t know what it was 30 seconds ago. Now confidently says three. (And he's right because he's German.)
Jethro – Big Sales, Big Window Staring
English. Spells his name properly.
If you’ve rented a bike, sent an email, or caught someone staring wistfully out the shop window - that’s Jethro.
Who is he?
“Jethro. Not with an F. With a TH.”
Loves a cider.
What he thinks he does vs reality:
Answers emails, sorts rentals, sells stuff… mostly stares out the window.
What he rides:
Swarf 155. (Yeh we don't know either, but it's purple.)
Tim Tam awareness:
Nope. Isn't that just a Penguin?